Awakened

After what felt like a long winter, we're back on the trails. The weather has increasingly gotten better, the days have gotten longer, and the sunshine radiates the warmth that we've been missing.

Unfortunately, the lockdown continues, but at least we can get outside more often and enjoy the fresh air.

"Things are going to get better. It's just a matter of time", I tell myself.

The truth is, no one knows how long this pandemic will last. I've already celebrated two COVID birthdays and I'm not about to hold my breath at this point.

We'll continue to sacrifice. We'll continue to adapt.

In the meantime, let's enjoy our time as much as possible. Let's not fall into a victim mentality, but rather hold our head up high and push onward.

There's something to be said about a person who, despite great difficulty, decides to aim upward towards the highest good. You can't break a person with that type of mindset.

This pandemic has forced everyone to take inventory of their own lives. How much can you tolerate? Where are your weak spots? How can you get stronger?

I think I've learned more about myself in the last year than I have in my entire life.

I fell into a pit of despair when the pandemic began, so I started working harder on my mind, body and spirit. I read countless books to educate myself, exercised daily, I took up prayer and meditation, and I quit drinking coffee and alcohol. I was doing anything I could to give me a sense of control in a world that was becoming more and more unstable.

I started to think deeper about everything I did. I questioned everything. All of this introspection eventually took me on a path to higher ground, where I began to view the world from a different perspective.

I started to do things I never imagined. For example, I started to paint after a 20 year hiatus. I forgot how much I missed it, and it was a breath of fresh air compared to my desk job as a graphic designer. Instead of moving the mouse around, I was moving paint, and it gave me new life.

In a world of big screens and digital imagery I realized that's not exactly where I see myself anymore. More than ever, I have an urge to create something tangible.

We'll see where this journey takes me. I'm excited about the possibilities.

Although COVID has taken a lot from us, it's forced us to look deeper and reflect on where we stand. Am I where I want to be? Am I on the right path? Am I the best possible father and husband? Do I hold myself accountable?

Suddenly there are no more excuses for ignoring these kinds of questions. So if there's one thing I'm grateful for (in the midst of this pandemic) it's THIS.

I've been awakened.

Looking back at 2020

We're well into 2021 but I wanted to leave some pictures here from 2020.

Early last year, around February, Arabella was discharged from the Pulmonary Function clinic at Sick Kids. She was no longer experiencing pulmonary hypertension. The arteries around her heart and lungs looked healthy, and the doctors gave her the green light. That was cause for celebration, so Arabella has her hands up!

Frolicking in the snow.

Our first skate on the ice.

Winter fun on her polar bear sled.

Painting her nails with Mom.

Bella's favourite: the merry-go-round at the Toronto Zoo, a month before the lockdown began.

Arabella's 3rd birthday. It might have been the last time we were indoors at Grandma and Grandpa's house.

March, 2020. Bella wonders why the park is off limits. "People are getting very sick and spreading germs", we told her.

Arabella's older cousin Faith gives her a large doll house to keep her entertained. Bella is very excited.

Playing doctor. Masks are now in fashion and Belle wants to take part in the new trend.

Belle gets her g-tube replaced. This might have been the first time we replaced the tube ourselves.

Making faces after bath time. She's always making us laugh.

Here we're pretending to sit around a camp fire (candle) in our living room.

Uncle Damian drops by for a visit in the backyard.

One of the best purchases we made last year: a bike seat for Belle. We would ride out almost daily and get some quality daddy-daughter time.

Batter up!

 

 Dad helping tighten her new "big girl bike" from Nana.

A view from up high, during one of our hikes.

Spaghetti for lunch. Although Bella still has a hard time eating, she does a good job of nibbling on a few of her favourites.

We receive a Barbie dollhouse from a neighbour's daughter, and Bella is super thankful.

Mom joins us for one of our evening bike rides.

Playing cars on the roads we drew and coloured on a large illustration board.

Saying "Hi!" to the bunny that lives around Grandma and Grandpas front yard.

The zoo finally reopens to the public in June. We watch a baby giraffe.

A quick summertime couch nap.

Cottage life. One of the best weeks we had all year at a cottage up north.

Appointment at the optometrists office.

Afterwards, she tries on glasses. Which one looks best?

Waiting at the dentist's office. Even Cub is wearing a mask.

First dental appointment. Everything looks good! Cub's teeth looked nice and clean, in case you were wondering.

Halloween is two months away. Bella tries on her witch costume.

Getting better at writing her own name. Mom writes it at the top, and Bella replicates it below.

Mom turns 33. The three of us dance, party, and eat cupcakes until the late hours of 10pm.

Buckle up! We're going on a ride.

We're back at the zoo. These made for great autumn pictures.

An evening walk among the colourful leaves.

Soaking up the sun in October, knowing that the cold months are just ahead.

Pumpkin carving!

 

Halloween finally comes around. Bella is a reindeer.

A beautiful sunset, as we look out our front door.

An unusually warm day in early November.

A visit to the mall. Mask, gloves, purse, antlers: CHECK.

First snowfall in late November. Bella was loving it.

Exercising with dad in the basement. Getting stronger!

Snowball fight in Grandma and Grandpas backyard. "Don't shoot!", Bella says.

Decorating her very own Christmas tree with all of her special ornaments.

It came out looking great!

Posing for a picture with our outdoor blow-up decorations.

Making Christmas crafts with Mom.

Christmas photo-shoot. 

And that was the year 2020! Phew!